MazReal

Image Pile-Up

2012-01-28T09:30:00.000-08:00

You don't get this with Kindles

Bang bang

I just love fridge money

...... or put the chap out of his misery with a well placed bullit between the eyes.

Good 'ol British Colonial doctors

Pipe smokers always find a way

Ronald Reagan was a Michael Jackson fan

Beefcake of the day. Lucky for us he's pulling something with a rope. Or is that a well placed savoy cabbage leaf?

I bet she doesn't share.

Oh No. Goodbye Tokyo.

Farrah barbie

Men looking cool with pipes.
Vincent Price.

All right. Go on. Gimme a fag.

Men looking cools with pipes.
Douglas Fairbanks Jnr.

Poor dad.

I could try a few rounds with Ali for this amount of spondulics.

This ought to do the work of God

Cute cat pic of the day

This Moose hasn't a chance in hell.

Wish you were here.

Tony The Tiger's put on a bit of weight. I reckon it's those frosty coatings.

How to eat stuff.

'A square in the wrong home is just not dug.'

2012-01-28T09:18:00.000-08:00

London Soho Coffee Bars of the 50s.

Very cool scene in the 2Is with a rock & roll band playing wildly and the crowd jiving away! A square invades a hipster coffee bar and all the cats give him the evil eye. “The French” is the most bohemian coffee house of the lot—with beatniks discussing planetary movements. Some of the coffee bars shown include: The 2Is, the French, the Macabre, Le Grande, Stockpot, Sam Widges, Melbray, Universal, La Roca, Freight Train, El Toro, Picasso, Las Vegas, Moka Bar, and more.

'A square in the wrong home is just not dug.'

Best Use Of Peephole Ever

2012-01-28T08:24:00.000-08:00

Long Pointy Shoe Craze Moves North Of The Border

2012-01-27T15:35:00.000-08:00

Friday Cute Dog Pic.

2012-01-27T14:23:00.000-08:00

Newt Moon Update

2012-01-27T14:22:00.000-08:00

It seems Newt wants to call his moonbase Newton after Sir Isaac Newton (not himself) And Lestoil will enjoy a huge resurgence as it becomes the official all-purpose cleaner on Newton. That pesky Newton dust ain't gonna clean itself, subservient housewives.

Newt's Fantasy Moonbase Illegal...

2012-01-27T09:39:00.000-08:00

Not only is Newt's plan for lunar statehood completely insane—it's also against the law! Not just any law, but space law, the most powerful of all laws, because it comes from the sky.

Gingrich's plan for an emphatically American moon colony and resultant 51st Moon State violates the Outer Space Treaty of 1967, which was pitched by the USSR, UK, and USA. Back then, the worry was putting nukes on the moon pointed at Moscow and/or Washington. Fast forward several decades, and it's spoiling Candidate Gingrich's low-gravity wet dream.
The treaty states, among other things, that:

The exploration and use of outer space shall be carried out for the benefit and in the interests of all countries and shall be the province of all mankind;
Outer space shall be free for exploration and use by all States;
Outer space is not subject to national appropriation by claim of sovereignty, by means of use or occupation, or by any other means;

Extending the United States of America directly onto the moon runs contrary to just about all of that.

Thanks to Gizmodo

Jesus Intervenes...

2012-01-27T08:15:00.000-08:00

Naughty Mexican Youth...Teach Yourself Words..

2012-01-27T08:14:00.000-08:00

Teach yourself the nine words in Spanish that stand for the Mexican youth of today. Seems to be the same perpetrator judging by his 80s hairdo.

Art - Milton Glaser Graphic Designer

2012-01-26T16:11:00.000-08:00

The work of revered graphic designer Milton Glaser

Tonight in New York, revered graphic designer Milton Glaser (do a Google Images search if that name doesn’t ring a bell) will take part in a panel discussion with Mirko Ilic about the creation of powerful politically driven graphics. The event is hosted by Reality Sandwich creative director, Michael Robinson

This panel discussion features graphic design legend Milton Glaser and award winning designer/illustrator Mirko Ilic focusing on graphic design’s ability to convey how power is effectively used and distributed, and justice is fulfilled. Based upon Glaser and Mirko’s book The Design of Dissent: Socially and Politically Driven Graphics, the authors will discuss how today’s image makers and corporate shamans can use design to create the more beautiful and just world we all know is possible.

Milton Glaser from Rui Amaral on Vimeo.

Our Human Ancestors

2012-01-26T16:00:00.000-08:00

Just A Reminder Of What An Interesting City We Live In

2012-01-26T08:01:00.000-08:00

Tats

2012-01-26T07:51:00.000-08:00

I bet their moms are not happy.

see more from this Tumblr

Wacky Chinese Do Hot Potato With Grenade

2012-01-25T18:34:00.001-08:00

Here is a video of some Chinese soldiers tossing around a live hand grenade, dumping it into a hole, and then acrobatically leaping away from the blast in unison like some weird Busby Berkeley number from Hell.

Just Mind-Boggling!!

2012-01-25T13:40:00.000-08:00

Fun starts round the minute mark

Stream Leonard Cohen's New Music Hymns Here:

2012-01-25T13:33:00.000-08:00

You can catch Leonard's growly new hymns here:

http://www.npr.org/2012/01/22/145340430/first-listen-leonard-cohen-old-ideas?ft=1&f=98679384

Got A Dog? Want It To Stop Pooping On The Street?

2012-01-25T11:18:00.000-08:00

Here's the solution. Click for super size.

You A Man? You Got An Itchy Crotch?

2012-01-25T11:13:00.001-08:00

Things Not To Put In Your Microwave.

2012-01-25T11:10:00.000-08:00

Primitive Art Tats

2012-01-25T11:01:00.000-08:00

image by Robert Doisneau.

And the two famous ones by him.

In Wonderland: The Surrealist Adventures of Women Artists in Mexico and the United States

2012-01-25T10:56:00.000-08:00

In the Box-Horizontal, 1962, by Ruth Bernhard. Part of the exhibit In Wonderland: The Surrealist Adventures of Women Artists in Mexico and the United States, at the Los Angeles County Museum of Art, opening this Sunday. (Image courtesy of the Ruth Bernard Archive, Princeton University Art Museum.)

http://www.lacma.org/art/exhibition/in-wonderland

The Duke by Photographer Phil Stern

2012-01-25T10:36:00.000-08:00

I pity the guy that put too much sugar in The Duke's coffee. He sure look mad.

This is what'll happen.

Everything's fine now that he's lit his cancer stick, slipped into some teeny little pants and picked up his man-bag.

He was very tenacious about protecting his identity as a western, macho he-man. He would not allow anyone to make fun of that except himself.

- Phil Stern (photographer)

Ever seen him without his hat before? Not me.

Phil Stern took these images.

Wayne and I were poster boys for the Odd Couple. Politically and socially, he was 140 degrees to the right of Genghis Khan. I was oppositely inclined. He’d call me a bomb-throwing Bolshevik. It was a love-hate thing. We’d get in big arguments, especially with a little booze in us.

- Phil Stern

Down Mexico way getting his daily hit of Pepsi

He was a mixed bag, like all of us. He had his tender, warm, loving moments, but he was also an S.O.B.

- Phil Stern

John down in Durango

Film Posters

2012-01-25T10:13:00.000-08:00

Whales And Dolphins Having as Good Time

2012-01-25T08:08:00.000-08:00

Sometimes, you need to start off your week with a dose of happy news. For instance, this video from the American Museum of Natural History details two recent instances where scientists have observed a whale and several dolphins interacting in ways that are something we might classify as "play".
It's hard to talk about animal behavior without getting too anthropomorphizing, but think about it this way: In both instances, the whale and dolphins did not appear to be competing with other, they did not appear to be fighting, nor were they cooperating in a goal-oriented way. When scientists say "animals are playing" they don't necessarily mean "play" the way human children play, but they do mean behaviors that go beyond simple eat/sleep/defend/breed necessities. Play might be learning. Play might be about forming social bonds that help an individual later on. And however you interpret it, spotting examples of spontaneous, inter-species play in the wild is kind of a big deal.
And now, with those caveats out of the way, I'd like to highlight the top comment on YouTube, by one Bill Kiernan: "We both used to be land animals, isn't that crazy? clearly we need to hang out."

Your Brain Will Melt After You See This Negative Image

2012-01-25T07:40:00.000-08:00

Want to add more wrinkles to that ol' brain of yours? Stare at the colored dots on the girl's nose in the photo above for 30 seconds. Then look at a white surface and start blinking. You should see a non-negative image of the girl. Yep, that jiggly stuff in your head just processed a negative image. Sweet.

NASA's New Hi Res Image OF Earth

2012-01-25T07:36:00.000-08:00

NASA has released a new Blue Marble image, showing the United States of America. According to them, it's the "most amazing, highest resolution image of Earth ever." Blue Marble 2012 bests the 2010 edition and the original one.

Click for full size. Although you can get the whopping 8000 X 8000 pixels image here

Hunter S Thompson

2012-01-23T19:58:00.000-08:00

Those Weird Pointy Shoe'd Mexicans Doing Weird Stuff

2012-01-23T19:45:00.000-08:00

A Room Full Of Pesos

2012-01-23T19:41:00.001-08:00

Last Week In Nevada - Route 447 and Route 50

2012-01-23T09:49:00.000-08:00

The Big Sky Nevada

Sandstorm along I50 'The Loneliest Road In America.'

Nixon Nevada

Route 447 North

Super 8 Motel Reno

Nixon Nevada

Before The Storm Reno

Outside Fallon

Gerlach Nevada

Lake Pyramid Nevada off route 447

We Are Sailing

2012-01-23T09:17:00.000-08:00

Historic Mexican Flags

2012-01-23T09:16:00.001-08:00

Image Mash-Up

2012-01-22T15:51:00.000-08:00

Nothing better to do sitting in a hotel in Phoenix.

Saucy eyes? Excitement? Conversation? Don't talk back?

For those smokers who just can't get enough shit in their lungs.

Right on man.

What wouldn't I give to be able to play the geetar like that fellow. Check out her reaction unless the waiter just stomped on her toe or the smoking dude dropped hot ash down her back.

Phoooey. Put a plug in it.
I always blame the dog.

Pesky GIs.

They start 'em young in the NRA.

Just what we all thought life on Uranus is about.

Limey tea and biscuits. That what I think of you. Gimme a whiskey and make it fast.

Bell and Howell loose sight of what they are selling.

Hee Hee. Take that you humourless idiots.

That's Mexico for you and the power of the AK 47

tattoo

The stunning Joan Crawford

Helloo Big Boy. What man wouldn't want their left bicep fondled by Jean Harlow

Heh Heh!

Tattoo

Ouch. Look at the weird collection in the background watching two women smack each other around.

Anything is art if you say so.

Smoking a peep can be considered cool in the mouth of the right person. Especially if your balaclava has a peep hole.

You gotta adapt as a photographer if you puff on a cheroot on a shoot.

Cat's eyes.

Tattoo

Doesn't quite ring true even for a comic.

I'm a man.

No one will suspect such an evil genius

Hee Hee!

2 piece loveliness

Thriller.......c 1890

Liz was such a tramp.

Things never change

Dorothy Lamour

It's those naughty GIs again. Can't think off anything else even when going in to shoot those pesky Japanese.

Cat's eyes.

Can't do this with a Kindle.

I whip off my Burberry, give you an eyeful of my sexy leopard skin outfit, point my left toe in your direction and blow a dirty great hole in you.

Blinged-up tattooed patriot.

I had one of these every day for breakfast for the last 6 days of this shoot up in Nevada. I think I'm going to die. Couldn't say no. It was the client's favourite start of the day.

Pesky Nazi monkeys . Can't get away from them.

Wasn't good for my gut.

Stalin. Cheeky scamp.

This is a real organic market.

Yeh right. I'm a union man.
No Scabs!!

Grass Flip Flops - Make everyday A Walk In The Park

2012-01-22T12:01:00.000-08:00

While it very much looks like real grass, the thick layer of green stuff on Kusa's sandals is actually a synthetic material known as Syn-Turf. It not only looks the part, but I bet it feels pretty similar to the real thing, without leaving grass stains on the bottom of your feet.

The material does need to be fluffed from time to time, but that's far easier maintenance than weeding, mowing, and fertilizing. And the sandals are available now in small, medium, and large sizes for about $31

[Kusa Shoes via Design Milk]

SOPA

2012-01-22T11:34:00.001-08:00

Ad - For All You Dog Lovers. The Bark Side

2012-01-21T12:19:00.000-08:00

VW ad.

Puppies and the Imperial March music from Star Wars.

Advertising - Crazy Japanese Watch Ad

2012-01-21T12:15:00.000-08:00

Where's daddy?

2012-01-21T12:09:00.000-08:00

Unfortunate juxtaposition.

Fortunate juxtaposition.

Movies - The shipwrecked Costa Concordia Features In a Movie Last Year

2012-01-21T12:02:00.000-08:00

The first movement, “Des choses comme ça” (“Such things”) of Jean-Luc Godard’s 2010 film Socialism, was filmed on board the tragically ship-wrecked Costa Concordia, which ran aground off the coast of Isola del Giglio, on Janury 13. Godard’s film dealt with the decline of capitalism, and questioned the role of socialist ideals within civilization. As Xan Brooks notes in the Guardian, the Costa Concordia served:

‘...as a self-conscious metaphor for western capital ploughing through choppy waters. In Godard’s film, the Concordia plays the role of a decadent limbo where the tourists drift listlessly amid the ritzy interiors. The passengers include a UN official and an elderly war criminal. The onboard entertainment comes courtesy of an unsmiling Patti Smith.

Socialism divided critics and left the audience with a foreboding sense of disaster.

Thanks to Dangerous Minds.

Graveyards Of The Dope Gods

2012-01-21T11:47:00.000-08:00

Dream homes of alleged drug lords.

Conspicuous consumption, fueled by meth and coke profits and a strip club aesthetic, results in an El Narco world upholstered in fine Corinthian leather, animal prints and gaudy swaths of velveteen.
What happens when the deal goes wrong and money can’t buy you out of some serious bad karma? These photos tell the tale. Graveyards of the Dope Gods.

'Drugs, like oil, can produce piles of cash in a hurry. And in several Mexican cities, there are massive homes with domes that have an Arabian flourish. The desert mansion of Amado Carrillo Fuentes — a drug lord famous for transporting cocaine in jumbo jets, and for dying after botched plastic surgery in 1997 — has even been called the Palace of 1,001 Nights, after the book of Middle Eastern and South Asian stories that included Aladdin.'

See The New York Times.

Sole Nel Piatto.......Sun On A Plate...

2012-01-14T09:34:00.000-08:00

Pizzas like these. Why can't we get them like this here ? Because the tomato sauce must be perfect and the dough thin with a slight 'give' into a pocket of air when you bite into them (60 seconds in an oven of 860 degrees using beechwood and oak in a domed oven). But people demand stuff like pineapple and tuna and chicken and minced meat and other crap placed on top smothered in gooey melted cheese that attaches your mouth to your plate.

I think pizzas from Napoli are supreme because pizzas were invented there and the tomato sauce is just right. It is the New Yorkers who have bastardized the classic pizza by putting all that other stuff on top to suit local tastes it seems. Much like TexMex food. As long as everything is covered by lava fields of melted cheese in one form or another. The Romans do put sausage, spinach and asparagus and cheese up top but not to the extent that we find in the UK and the USA.

Good dough with air pockets, a spoon of tomato sauce, some garlic, a taste of Cetara anchovies and sprigs of basil. That's it. It should be street food. It was developed as street food.

Music - Secular Musical Transcendentalism from Within the Battered Temple of Spirituality

2012-01-13T11:38:00.000-08:00

What the hell is that all about, you may ask....................

An introduction to Tim Hecker's ambient sounds.

tim hecker - ravedeath 1972 (album preview) by experimedia

"It is in parts a document of air circulating within a wooden room, and also a pagan work of physical resonance within a space once reserved for the hallowed breath of the divine. Recorded in a church in Reykjavik, Iceland and using a pipe organ as the primary sound source.

While the title of the piece 'Hatred of Music' might be a clue, the album is also partly an attempt to confront a pervasive negativity surrounding music. Historical rituals of destroying pianos, mountains of pirated CDRs pushed by bulldozers in Eastern Europe, or the melancholy of the digital music era began as sideline motifs which quickly informed the work on this record. They also really didn't at all.
Despite that the context is wide open in such a form of musical abstraction, the substance of these immersive compositions showcases Hecker's continued mastery of organizing sound into a visceral near entity. It is an almost physical presence that the listener feels as much as hears. This work is a significant contribution to Hecker's oeuvre, one which spans over ten years of musical production. Ravedeath is an enigmatic document of beauty and force."

With words like that surely they alone would pique your interest in at least having a listen.

Try this one from From The Mouth Of The Sun.

From The Mouth of The Sun - Pools of Rust (Danny Saul Remix - dannysaul.blogspot.com) by experimedia

They all go back to Brian Eno's

Ambient 1: Music for Airports

Great music to muse to or tie yourself in knots doing yoga or pilatas or any of those other relaxing pursuits you do accompanied by incense or just lying in a hammock watching the clouds go by.

How To Ensure Your Popularity Soars.....

2012-01-13T11:10:00.000-08:00

Purchase a Brondell Swash 1000 Bidet Toilet Seat..

The Brondell Swash 1000. What a name and imagine how popular you will become at your next dinner party with your guests positively queuing up to place their bottoms on this the Rolls Royce of toilet seats. You can lazily slap instant Pot Noodles in front of them and still your ex-friends will bang on your door for an invite just so they can be your friend again and get their nether bits aerated and gently sprayed AND deodorized AND warmly dried whilst smilingly sitting on a adjustable heated seat.

WARNING you may have to include one of these Torreo Cattle Prods in your Swash 1000 purchase just to get people off the throne of luxury.

What The Average Mexican Youth Blogs

2012-01-12T18:51:00.000-08:00

Tumblr as we all know is a great blogging site if you want to paste images that catch your eye and relate what you feel at that time. Like pasting pictures on your bedroom wall. Young kids use Tumblr a lot. I was at boarding school so never had the opportunity to cover my bedroom wall with pictures but I suppose thinking back I would have had the classic Ché and Castro portraits, images of the worker's red flag and strikes, raised fists, police brutality, barbed wire and all that socialist and communist thinking stuff and ban the bomb and "the only good fast breeder is a rabbit" , Led Zeppelin, Pink Floyd and Margot Fontaine (I was also into ballet).

I use Tumblr as an extension of my commercial photography website and many of my images I upload get reblogged many times so I sometimes follow them and come across some interesting places where they have appeared. And in my travels around Tumblr I gathered some material that appears a lot from Mexican youth.You can see their influences in music and politics and fashion. Narco corridas, Pancho Villa and his revolutionaries, rap, violence, guns, big hats, bouncing cars appear a lot.

Prismas Mexico

Art - Ranting Art Thoughtz From Hennessy Youngman

2012-01-12T12:36:00.000-08:00

Entertaining art rant review of Damien Hirst from newest art critic Hennessy Youngman.

New Doors Track Discovered - 'She Smells So Nice'

2012-01-12T12:29:00.000-08:00

She Smells So Nice by The Doors Official

FILM - Insane Mexican Punkzploitation Movie

2012-01-12T12:06:00.000-08:00

This is an insane paen to everything that was glorious about cinema’s misrepresentation of punks. It’s basically every alarmist rumor about punk rock — not to mention just about every single convention of 70s exploitation film — rolled into a single representation: drugs, orgies, spitting, bad hair, Satanic rituals, murder, rape, loud music, makin’ faces at the squares, and with the addition of dune buggies and, for some reason that can only be “because it’s Mexico,” a luchadore. We begin with a line of nuns walking down the street to a bank, which they promptly rob. Because these aren’t nuns at all; these are the women of the titular intrepidos punks, amassing cash so they can buy weapons and drugs that will help them free the imprisoned male members of the gang.

The reveal of the female punks is perhaps the greatest transformation scene in cinema history, as they strip away their nun duds to reveal leather thongs, metal bikini tops, sequins, chains, lace, mesh, breasts, and all manner of candy colored punk rock hair. The leader is the sneering, snarling Beast, played by actress Princess Lea (obviously her real name), and the height of her platinum blonde hairdo defies all known physics. And though her hair and studded leather bikini may be one of the star attractions, my heart was immediately stolen by the girl with the choppy red hair and spider-web face paint. For me, the true stars of the film are the girl with the spiky red hair and spiderweb face paint and the guy with the bright red poodle perm mullet, Fu Manchu mustache, lazy sort of expression, and exceptionally proud posture.

ART - Vacuum Sealed Couples

2012-01-12T11:53:00.001-08:00

A Japanese artist, who goes by the name “Photographer Hal,” takes these really bizarre photographs of real couples in vacuum-sealed plastic bags which he considers to be the ultimate union. Apparently the couples are without oxygen for 10 seconds, just long enough for him to snap three photos.

New Printer Turns Your Pets Into Monsters..

2012-01-12T10:05:00.000-08:00

This is the latest in print technology....

Casio have developed a 2D to 3D printer that turns your pets and other humans into downright horrible trans-dimensional taxidermy creatures that come straight from a Victorian Museum.

I reckon they would have more success showing it off at The Adult Entertainment Expo coming next. That'll sure to get everyone's attention.

I don't even want to think about it..

Some Old and newish Ads.....

2012-01-11T12:33:00.000-08:00

Thing-o-rama at the driver-in. I'll be there.

It seems to OK to spray a woman in the chest area while she is singing in a field with cold water if you wear a lab coat. Otherwise I really wouldn't try without unless you want a damn good slapping and a law suit dumped on your cheesy smiling head.

Let him in? A naked dwarf carrying a suitcase banging on your door out in the middle of a scary forest. No way.

It remains unclear to me what 'kitten hips' are..

I presume Carter Mouldettes will squeeze your otherwise normal hips into something resembling a dancing kitten with enormous thigh muscles.

So this product does exactly what it says on the blurb.

That's not stuffed lettuce. It's a lettuce chopped into 8 chunks interspersed with parsley, what looks like Fud Ham or Cham, a tin of peas emptied up top and some eggs tossed thereabouts. Call me a snob but that looks horribly unappetizing.The Del Monte peas I buy off the shelf here are as tender as ball bearings.

Now these are what I want for Christmas.

Wish I was a lucid as this guy on my first date. Maybe because I wasn't drinking a shed-full of non alcoholic beverages and other intoxicants and so was she/he or it. I wasn't quite sure at the time because I found myself in a muddy ditch the next morning with bramble scratches everywhere, torn clothes and horrible stinging nettle wounds everywhere else.

I am flying out in a couple of days and asked for one of these. The cheeky US Airways rep couldn't stop laughing and pointing me out to all her colleagues while they all began to roll around on the floor holding their stomachs and roaring.

Is there a psychoanalyst in the house.

I'll be sure not to wear my figure slimmer if I was going out for more than a few beers. I'd need some assistance to manipulate open the crotch piece and bear the laughter of my fellow pee mates.

Click to read the tale of the slightly over-obsessed bobstich owners.

Peas again. Everyone seems to waiting for the other to do something. I reckon the man in the dapper yellow waistcoat is going to flick his spoonful of bullet-hard peas across the table into the face of the slightly dodgy-looking woman in houndstooth suit because as you can see her right hand is slowly inching towards the knife with which she is going to stab the grinning woman in the forehead and he can see her intentions. Who is going to get there first?

This actually what happened:

Fancy stirrups to hold up your fiesta colored deep tender luxurious bath towels, how clever can you get? Great if you want pilfer them, jump on your horse parked up outside and gallop outta there with your feet firmly lodged into a new pair of gleaming bathroom stirrups..

They're talking (and laughing loudly, I expect) about your man Gregory because he looks like a horrible little schoolboy with his short pants half way up his chest and knobbly knees open to the elements.

Botany Ties for your man in 'sand hues' so he can imagine a beautiful bikini-clad woman lying on the sand and not you.

DUZ nearly as good a name as Fud. Acquiring a 10 inch bladed home size cleaver is just the thing for when your husband gets home from work and complains about peas for dinner or complains because his clothes don't smell of Duz or complains that you haven't put his slippers out or prepared his favourite pipe. A 10 inch blade is sure to be the right size to put a good enough dent in his thick skull.

We had one of these and it was our first and only car and my parents spent half their lives paying for it. But it was a great ride as French cars are. I remember a Guinea Fowl flew out a hedge and splattered across the windscreen both going at full speed. Didn't damage the glass at all.

I had one of these when I was a student and now it is a chicken coop on a farm which was the last place it got to before expiring.

Jesus, you cook all those things with malt extract. I'm going out now to buy some.

She earned her first academy award for this movie. I don't remember it being a vampire movie though. I think I'll take another look at it as I must have missed this scene and the name of the movie in today's world sounds a tad dodgy.

She certainly has a well stocked fridge stocked with some tasty treats but one would kind of lose things very easily amongst that decorous kitchen.

Thank God I found these. Why, I am a very shy and bashful man and I imagine my social life is going to become unexpectedly full with these guaranteed Girl Getters. Now I know what to do when I see that 'gleam in her eye' from across the room, just hand her a card and break the ice. Christ only knows what it says on the cards, but hey, that doesn't matter. They are guaranteed!

Hope you have a good dentist round the corner to repair those chipped and broken teeth.

Map Of Pig Nicknames of The States

2012-01-10T17:05:00.000-08:00

H.W. Hill & Co. of Decatur Illinois, the sole manufacturer of Hill's hog ringers, produced this map called "Nicknames of the States." It is from 1884.

There is a pig for every state in the union, and each pig sports a triangular nose ring.

The nickname for a Missouri pig is "Puke."

click map for higher res.

What Books Get Up To When You Lock Up Shop

2012-01-10T16:53:00.000-08:00

See, books have a life of their own and they are happy and I just offloaded about 50 books over at the library up the road and had a chat with the nice people who look after the place and it got me out the house. Books also give their owners a life and who knows what routes they will take within their own life until they fall apart or are recycled. My first big fat book I owned - Dune - followed me round the globe on my first backpacking trip till it eventually got thinner and thinner. I recycled it as toilet paper (starting from the front naturally) in an area of Africa where the proper stuff did not exist and I am grateful to the House Atreides and the desert Arrakis as a result. It's pages, sometimes when desperate for Rizlas, I used to roll around some ganja when I did that sort of thing. It didn't taste good but it did the job. Imagine trying to do all that with a Barnes and Noble thingy or the Amazon Kindle.

Music.........Jonathan Wilson.......Gentle Spirit

2012-01-10T11:10:00.000-08:00

Trying to describe music in words is like doing a sketch of a novel, but Wilson’s guitar can exhibit the inventiveness and precision of Stephen Stills or the fiery, almost architectural lines of Pink Floyd’s David Gilmour, often in the same song. It’s been said that his music sounds like CSNY jamming with Pink Floyd and this is, I think you’ll agree, quite an accurate description. Another way to get your head around Gentle Spirit is that it often sounds like a “Southern California” version of Radiohead.

Jonathan Wilson - Desert Raven from Bella Union on Vimeo.

Jonathan Wilson - Natural Rhapsody Music Video from Michael Graham on Vimeo.

Bonnie And Clyde Guns For Sale

2012-01-09T16:22:00.000-08:00

Looking for a romantical gift? How about his and hers Bonnie and Clyde guns, seized at the outlaw couple’s Joplin hideout in 1933 after a shootout. The rare weapons are going up for auction in Kansas City this month.

The 45-caliber, fully automatic Thompson submachine “Tommy” gun and 1897 Winchester 12-gauge shotgun have been festering unappreciated at some police museum until now. The owners — descendants of cops involved in the raid — want the new owner to be someone who appreciates historic weapons and the Bonnie & Clyde crime fable.

Bored Silly? Be a Crappy Musician For a While.....

2012-01-09T16:07:00.000-08:00

Sing In The Shower

http://www.showersong.noisegames.com/

and be a punk in an instant

http://www.pcpunk.noisegames.com/

and others just messing around with your computer keyboard

http://www.noisegames.com/

3 Year Old MacDonald Fries v 3 Year Old KFC Fries

2012-01-09T15:22:00.000-08:00

and here's a French Spiderman cheeseburger..........

The Movie Alien Scared Me Witless.....

2012-01-09T14:58:00.000-08:00

The movie Alien was the only film that scared the pants off me and still does on repeated viewings. As a result I never watch scary films now unless I am out of the room and then annoy the hell out of my partner shooting questions at her regarding what went on and how it ended.

This is one of the first commercials he directed for UK TV. (That's really how we all speak in England)

Here is the prequel to Alien soon out - Prometheus also by Ridley Scott. Guaranteed to scare you even more..

David Bowie 65 !!!!!!

2012-01-09T14:22:00.000-08:00

Here's some incidental stuff to illustrate what star he is and his impact on our culture.

This is him on The Brixton Pound (Brixton is a borough in SW London where I used to live for many years)It' such a cool place they have their own currency.

David Bowie, in his Aladdin Sane guise, is featured on the new local currency you can only use in the Brixton district of South London. Known as the Brixton Pound, or the B£, the first round of the notes in 2009 featured Olive Morris, the radical political activist who founded the Brixton Black Women’s Group and played a pivotal role in the squatters’ rights campaigns of the 1970s; scientist James Lovelock who developed the ‘Gaia’ theory; C L R James, Trinidadian journalist, historian and socialist; and painter Vincent Van Gogh.

Here he is whacking Iggy Pop (homosuperior???)

But this was when he was 60 and he still has it.

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The True Story Of Franckenstein The Monster Maker

2012-01-09T14:11:00.000-08:00

According to a French to English language student....

How Your Images Get From The Camera To The Card..

2012-01-09T14:05:00.000-08:00

We all take pictures and here's something interesting, to me anyway,

Lexar has created this video that depicts the path a digital photo takes from camera to memory card to computer, with an emphasis on the inner workings of the card and how a card reader can impact transfer speed.

We Need More Mazatlán Woman Statues!

2012-01-08T13:13:00.000-08:00

I sometime wonder at the alignment of The Mazatlán Woman as she's only holding her arms open to embrace the rich people living on the hill. It would interesting if her plinth were to be uprooted and placed on a revolving mechanism where she could slowly revolve spreading her welcoming arms to everything within 360 degrees.

We at MazReal however, have a dream that may realized, but probably not in our lifetime, that she could be duplicated and placed everywhere so no one misses out on her embrace. We could even place one or two in MoMa. This image illustrates what the future could be like for Olas Altas and what a bright future it looks. Imagine how our lives will be improved!

They have them under the sea in Cancun (British sculptor Jason de Caires Taylor) so why not above the sea here in Mazatlán as under the sea here is a bit grubby.

It's time to start a dialogue and get a petition together.

Yesterday Along The Malecón...

2012-01-08T09:58:00.000-08:00

Strolling back from the organic market empty handed (by the time I arrived at 11.30 everything had gone but hopefully in the future it will grow. Organically one hopes.) I came upon a fog.

I am always happy to see a fog come down as it adds an extra dimension to what has become familiar.

Anyone For Shanghai Hairy Crabs?

2012-01-08T09:09:00.000-08:00

Hugh Like You Never Seen Him

2012-01-07T17:16:00.000-08:00

We always think of Hugh Grant as a bumbling, stuttering Englishman but we think this is a great image of him. Kind of gives him a cool James Dean quality especially after his stand against the Murdock press and the phone hacking scandal that allowed him to show his true intellect and verbal qualities when questioned in the subsequent inquiry.

Taken by Greg Williams

Little People Around The Globe

2012-01-07T17:03:00.000-08:00

The Little People Project

Clouds by Dave Robb. Opening Night at La Luna.

2012-01-07T15:42:00.000-08:00

For a High Def version go here, slip on some headphones and whack the volume up.

Hummingbird Nesting

2012-01-06T16:42:00.000-08:00

You can complain all you like about rats, termites and roaches invading and destroying your tropical home but when you have one of these sitting in its nest a few feet above your head every time you walk into the house and it doesn't give a damn about your presence, everything is alright with the world. And when you are sitting in the sun having breakfast and the fearless bird buzzes over and investigates your nose from 5 inches away you feel things cannot get any better.

Female White Eared Hummingbird

©2012 Matt Mawson

Trailer For The Oscars

2012-01-06T14:11:00.001-08:00

WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOW

2012-01-05T18:43:00.000-08:00

The Dumbest SkyMall Product of the Year Is Already Out

2012-01-05T16:30:00.000-08:00

StarScreen Social Backdrop

Herewith the dumbest SkyMall contraption of the year: the StarScreen Social Backdrop, a piece of printed plastic that attaches to your chair to show a background when you videochat.

Check out the description:

Our delightful StarScreen Social Backdrops make video chatting and conferencing fun. It gives your chat buddy the illusion you're in a fresh and exotic environment.
Convert your messy room in an instant.
Show off new backdrop designs to all of your social network friends.

You can turn your "messy room" into a beach, Mount Rushmore, Venice, Yosemite, Bora Bora, a night club... even another clean office.

Seriously, who buys this crap? This plastic piece of solidified imbecility costs $30! Go buy now you social networking fiends

Obama Is Now On Tumblr

2012-01-05T16:16:00.000-08:00

http://barackobama.tumblr.com/

The Best Selling Sexy Dude Calendars Of 2012

2012-01-05T15:58:00.000-08:00

You better be careful when choosing a hot-dude calendar because, unlike real life sexy men, you have to keep it around for a whole year. The good news is that sexy men calendar makers are starting to catch on that what women like more than sexy men is humour and, above all, cute animals.

Hang on what's going on here.

Darth Vader Bun.

2012-01-05T15:51:00.000-08:00

I'm finally jealous of the French. To promote the re-release of The Phantom Menace in THREE DEE, French fast food chain Quick is making a Darth Vader Burger complete with a black bun. A BLACK BUN. On a burger!There's also a Jedi Burger, but whoever wants the snoozefest of a regular bun when the other option is way more revoltingly appealing? The 'Dark Vador' (haha, Frenchies) Burger is available until March 1st in France.

Banana Opener For The World's Laziest People

2012-01-05T15:47:00.000-08:00

Kirk Cameron below wouldn't like it as he purports that the banana is an atheist's nightmare and the scary thing is that he's deadly serious.

Nude Shows Up On French Childrens Fashion Ad

2012-01-05T12:38:00.000-08:00

Now that's a photobombing.
The man showed up today on La Redoute's Website in a photo promoting their kidswear. The image has apparently since been removed, and the retailer has apologized on facebook. How could professional people miss that?!? Did they miss it? Or, is that the photographer's pervy uncle? This is just hilarious.

Choose What Dorito Commercial You Want To See At The Superbowl....

2012-01-05T12:35:00.000-08:00

http://www.crashthesuperbowl.com/#

How To Do CPR The 'Ard Way....

2012-01-05T12:27:00.000-08:00

Our favourite British 'ard man Vinnie Jones tells you 'ow it's done.

It's Time For A Mash-UP

2012-01-05T12:26:00.000-08:00

Ever seen two condiment arms wrestling? No, neither have I.

Talking of rats. Great album though.

It sure does!

Check out that nighttime line up....

One way to start killing them from a young age..

Tennis Star

Goddamn Nazis Get everywhere.

?????

Wilma and Betty

Instant God? You gotta have minty breath to speak to Him.

Great image of a great actor

Winfield Scott Pugh a B. S. M. D.? I bet. These sex therapists always give themselves a high fallootin' name.

Debatable....

Gotta get me a peep. You can smile broadly and smoke

Surly Steve Tyler

Womant.

Dark Horse

Not everyday you get to see a pic of Gustav Klimt

Looks like torture.

Sky Hi Heels....

Looks fascinating. You turn this and that wheel goes round.

Hope y'all bought your mother a gun.

Wow and I mean WOW.

Reminds me of my father. The old Scrooge.

Just a reminder

Don't you just love him?

Wouldn't like to be landing those shoes.

Please let me be the psycho so I can stab to death anyone who buys this

Three questions. One: is that the chair George Clooney made in "Burn After Reading"? Two: do I have to wear the floating crown? Three: are those the creepiest two men ever born? And maybe a fourth - are those the creepiest quotation marks you've ever seen?

Racist 'Vote Republican" poster of 1948

"Well, we want his hands to be dark, but not completely black, so it gives us some wiggle room. Yeah, that's good. But we need that little girl to be lily white. Perfect."

BREEZY MOTEL
Our magnificently modern, mountain top motel. Featuring: air-conditioning by Nature, Bumpyrest mattresses, running water (when raining), each room with private path (to outhouse). One block from wilderness in the heart of Nature’s unspoiled beauty.

If anyone started a cocktail bar like this in Mazatlán with these alcoholic contraptions, I'll be the first banging on the door for entrance.

EAT MY MEAT, COWBOY!
Meet 1968’s Miss Nebraska Stock Grower, Ann Coffee Harrison, Nebraska, Convention Queen of the Meat Meet.

Potatoes aplenty

From land treated with 10 gallons of D-D® Soil Fumigant per acre, row treatment, Richard Pacetti harvested 195 cwt/A of potatoes. Untreated land yielded only 150 cwt/A. Here’s what Mr. Pacetti says: “I’m going to use D-D on every acre next year. If I can’t get D-D to put on my potato land next year, I’m not going to plant. R.P.”

Man in a bar: So, anyway, can I call you Perma? You from around here? Never seen you before. Nice machinery you got there. Haha. Can I buy you a drink? I’m a Sagittarius. What’s your sign?
Miss Perma-Vend: STOP

A Megalopolis Can Be Beautiful...........

2012-01-05T09:40:00.000-08:00

....if you look at it from above. São Paulo.

Prepare To Be Sick Or Mesmerised

2012-01-04T11:27:00.001-08:00

Today Is Isaac Newton's 369th Birthday.

2012-01-04T10:19:00.000-08:00

Today marks the 369th would-be birthday of Sir Isaac Newton, one of the most remarkable, prolific, and influential cross-disciplinary scientists in human history.

...and here's a list of sins he committed before Whitsunday 1662

Women On Bicycles And The Rules To Obey Whilst Doing It.

2012-01-04T10:08:00.000-08:00

Here's some rules for all you cycling women. Albeit from the Victorian Era.

Remember the most important one down the list ; Don't Exercise Your Jaws In Public.

Just A Nice Image

2012-01-04T09:54:00.000-08:00

Obama Has Great Handwriting

2012-01-04T09:47:00.000-08:00

I mean, if the leader of the free world has the time to write thank you notes by hand, I don't want to hear anything from the rest of us about not being able to "get around to it."

However I do not fully agree with him regarding Life Of Pi.

Following On From The Blog Following This.....

2012-01-03T14:03:00.000-08:00

Here’s 27 minutes of vintage mosquito, cockroach and creepy-crawly insect repellent spray commercials brought to you by Japan. I have to admit I watched the entire thing and found it thoroughly enjoyable—especially the 70s commercials.

Dirty Rats and Other Mean Mother@*//?"!+>ing House Pests

2012-01-03T13:41:00.000-08:00

It doesn't take long for a house left for any length of time empty in the tropics to be taken over by dirty rats and other mean spirited pests of the insect world. After a three month absence I come back to termites destroying the woodwork in the library and eating the innards of a dozen books including my cheap detective trash, a classic copy of Moby Dick (Jesus leave that book alone. It's like swimming through mud having to squint through the tiny writing, delicately turn the thin pages and wade through pages of footnotes.) I don't care that Norman Mailer's 1300 page tome A Time Of Our Time was chomped and his unwieldy, inexplicable Ancient Evenings as I was about to pay the library up the road to take it off my hands. I have a half eaten A Prison Notebook by the Italian communist Gramsci which again I do not mind too much as it was turning me slowly into an old style Bolshevik and raving lunatic. But I am really pissed off about The Conquest Of Mexico and History Of London, both enormous door-stoppers that I leave lying around to make myself look studious. Eaten except for the covers that disintegrated in my hands. I found termites making mud passageways across 3 meters of wooden beams 5 meters up that need a scary ladder climb and toxic fumed termite stuff to rectify, more termites making holes in the drawer that contain kitchen utensils and sharp knives which all fell onto my bare toes when I opened it to get a teaspoon and an army of termites invading the plaster board under the mezzanine which as a result calls for major renovation. They came in through the electricity ducts and out the sockets. Believe me that calls for intelligence, communication, forward planning and organization. How can you beat that. It's like trying to make a stand when the Chinese throw their army in a suicide rush at your trench and you are armed with a Steed sword stick in one hand and a copy of last years M! magazine in the other.

I found following my nose a dead rat dried out and stinking surrounded by maggots under a cushion on the day bed and one more festering under the Cuban Royal palm flattened as if the air has been sucked out of it. The store cupboard now looking as though an indoor hurricane had torn the place apart as a result of the pre-deceased rat eating its way through and scattering the remains of two packs of kitchen aluminium foil, a few rolls of cling wrap, a plastic container of antiseptic powder and another of antibiotic powder and various medical supplies and tablets, a gnawed rat-sized hole in a portable hard plastic 20 liter travel ice box through which it entered in one end and came out the other (having fun it seems), the ice box guaranteed by the manufacturers to survive a fall down a 600 foot mountain drop but not the yellow teeth of a pissed off rat, the destruction of a cardboard box containing a dozen bottles of wine which fell over and rolled about the floor, and the eating and spitting out of two boxes that contained fine Scotch Whisky and thank Christ it ate through a box of rat poison. The stuff that fortuitously led to its eventual demise - a sweet pink coloured rat poison that is tasty to a rat but contains an awful toxic substance that slowly dehydrates the creature from the inside out causing what i would presume to be terrible pain and a slow agonizing death that ends in the creature thrashing around then dropping dead under a cushion as i said on our wrought iron day bed. A bed that I spend every waking hour doing nothing but staring into space. We don't keep food lying about so Christ knows what it was up to. Chewing anything it can get it's teeth into and scattering the debri around smacks of a mean spirited rodent with a grudge. Maybe it remembered me when I chased one like it around the garden with a broom and only winged it as it scarpered up the Jasmine.

As a result of the dead rat decomposing on the day bed we had to throw out the mattress, three cushion and a blanket overlay and dig a hole and discard the darkened contaminated soil from under the rat under the palm tree. How the fucking thing got into the house is also a mystery as the only access from the outside is a one centimeter gap under the glass patio doors and a two centimeter plastic pipe for the cable modem wire.

Carpenter bees have also made themselves at home in three beams providing support for the Copa de Oro resulting in one of the now virtually hollow beams to snap in half and drop to the terrace below which could have caused the death of anyone who would have been unlucky to have been lying in the hammock underneath and over the last 4 years we have replaced all 12, bar these last three. Carpenters bees have the uncanny ability to gnaw through iron hard wood excavating intricate tunnels that can, after they have vacated them, become the home of a colony of large nipping black ants that rain down on the head when the time comes to replace the beam as was the case last summer that resulted in my bald pate to be horribly stung a number of times and a fair number falling down my shirt.

However there is one group of insects that endear themselves to me and those are crickets. Those lively little critters that jump up like firecrackers bouncing off your face every time you lift a stone or discarded tile or move a rock and they often bounce into the house and hide behind the sofa and chirrup incessantly when the lights go out. When you been away they multiply in numbers and keep the night alive with tropical noise.

I think I'm gonna go out and buy myself a gun.......A dirty rat gun for the dirty rats.........

and a gun that shoots around corners for the bee in its hole.....

and a space gun for all the other pesky pests that inhabit my domain..........

Our advice to anyone desirous of living in Mazatlán, buy a concrete bunker or a corrugated tin shack.

PS

Last night jet lag kept me staring at the ceiling at 3 am and I heard another rat or large creature shaking the Jasmine and entwined Bougainvillea outside my bedroom as it climbed down from across the roof and empty lot next door to scout around my property. Its scrabbling continued off and on for a while and the patter of rat feet across the window sill outside proved that it had probably gone for a snack of the aforementioned pink rat dehydrator that it finds hard to resist and that I placed conveniently under the window. Later I noticed a dent in the pile of poison pellets so no doubt we will have another dead rodent on our hands in a day or so.

Lois Lane The Super Hero Groupie and Others...

2012-01-02T19:26:00.000-08:00

Here's a confused super hero....

Super Antics.....

Music...Great Song To Start the Year

2012-01-02T19:11:00.000-08:00

ART : Portrait In Pot. Snoop Dogg

2012-01-02T19:08:00.000-08:00

Snoop Dogg portrait made from marijuana, hash and joints by artist Jason Mecier. That’s $1,500 worth of THC on the canvas.

MAZREAL'S BEST OF THE YEAR STUFF....

2012-01-01T19:49:00.001-08:00

Best When You Cannot Choose Between Sex And Weed Thingy Of The Year..

2012-01-01T19:48:00.000-08:00

The Peter Piper Pecker Puffer. Get it here from The Passion Shop

Best Band Of The Year Who Wear One Black Glove ...

2012-01-01T17:17:00.000-08:00

Sadly Sean Bonniwell lead singer and songwriter for The Music Machine died of lung cancer at 71.

Best Image From Mexico Of The Year

2012-01-01T16:48:00.000-08:00

Inmate Juan Ramirez Tijerina remains curled inside a suitcase after he was caught trying to escape from prison with the help of his girlfriend following a conjugal visit in Chetumal, Mexico.

Biggest Wanker Of The Year...

2012-01-01T16:42:00.000-08:00

Jim Pike......

Best "Sit Back And Enjoy" Moment Of David Lynch Movie Mash Up..

2012-01-01T16:17:00.000-08:00

This 20 minute mood piece composed of clips from films by or about another of my favourite movie directors David Lynch plays out like one long extended epiphany. Lovingly put together by Richard Vezina.

Music : Angelo Badalamenti/David Lynch : Questions In A World Of Blue, The Pink Room, Into The Night, Mysteries of Love
Vocal : Julee Cruise
Films:
Inland Empire, Mulholland Dr., The Straight Story, Lost Highway, Fire Walk with Me, Twin Peaks, Wild at Heart, Blue Velvet, Dune, The Elephant Man, Eraserhead, The Grandmother, The Alphabet, Pretty as a Picture: The Art of David Lynch, Blue Velvet - Mysteries of Love: Documentary

Most Interesting Song And Vid Of The Year....

2012-01-01T16:05:00.000-08:00

A music video for the song "Streetlight" by John Maus, "We Must Become the Pitiless Censors of Ourselves." Footage is from the 1981 film "Ms. 45," starring Zoë Lund and directed by one of my favourite directors Abel Ferrara.

Most Impressive Film Researcher Of The Year...

2012-01-01T15:54:00.000-08:00

Montreal-based movie buff StooTV has put together a loving homage to Raiders Of The Lost Ark and the cinematic tradition that Steven Spielberg’s epic adventure pays tribute to and draws from. The brilliantly titled Raiders Of The Lost Archives is a “shot-by-shot comparison of Raiders of the Lost Ark vs. scenes from 31 different adventure films made between 1919-1973.”

The amount of research that went into this 13 minute ode to Indy and his predecessors is impressive to say the least.

The Most Ridiculously Precious Teen Of The Year...

2012-01-01T15:42:00.000-08:00

13 year old Elle Fanning for Teen Vogue.

You may remember her sister Dakota annoyingly screaming her way through War Of The Worlds with Tom Cruise.

Stupidest Invention Of The Year..

2012-01-01T15:21:00.000-08:00

I bet he never gets a girlfriend or a boyfriend.

Some Of The Worst Ads Of 2011

2012-01-01T14:54:00.000-08:00

.....and the crapiest photo to go with it and how many people adopted the word that the ad agency tried to promote? When I first spotted it, my unconscious immediately thought it was an ad for veganism and then I thought WTF are they squeezing body parts through a mincing machine for?

Canadian hair salon playfully employs domestic violence imagery

This ad agency got nuked by women online and soon pulled it.

Kia ad with some clever pedophilia messaging

Kis USA responded:

IRVINE, Calif., June 24, 2011 - Kia Motors America (KMA) has become aware of an offensive piece of advertising material that was created by an ad agency in Brazil that KMA has no business relationship with and has never worked with. This ad was not created in the U.S. by Kia Motors America or any of its marketing partners and does not reflect the opinions or values of KMA or Kia Motors Corporation. The ad is undoubtedly inappropriate, and on behalf of Kia Motors we apologize to those who have been offended by it. We can guarantee this advertisement has never and will never be used in any form in the United States, and our global headquarters in Seoul, South Korea is addressing the issue with the independent Brazilian distributor.

Maybe the most iconic race protest photo in history is used to sell...

??????...............

Brazil again in this homophobic dull ad....