Saturday, April 23, 2011

El Quelite- First Report From Our New Travel Writer Jock 'Dusty' Karrooac

El Quelite - The pretty town that 'switches' off after you've gone. The pretty town that 'amazes your eyes'.

Herewith in anticipation the first travel report from the slightly jaundiced point of view of our new travel writer Jock Karrooac visiting a town that was chosen as 'best day trip' from that other illustrious mag. 

"If you like to visit an Mexican town that could be the setting out of a Hollywood movie whose producers  think real Mexico looks like this town with sweetly smiling local residents sitting on their verandas in rocking chairs waiting to be photographed by the tourists. If you like waiters in aprons jumping out of nowhere offering menus from their restaurants, teenagers dressed up and painted like Ulama players asking for money even before they have played a game (it is best to demand they play a game before you give them money as they could be cheeky kids in fancy dress. I did ask for a demonstration and they turned on their heels and instead stuck their hand into the face of a surprised Japanese lady who immediately placed an unaccustomed amount into the open palm.)

If you like to see lads sitting on the backs of patient donkeys giving them a damn good whipping to impress the visitors whilst the little muchachos shove their open hands into your face demanding money. If you want all this then this is the place to go. 

Young lad on a rolling-eyed donkey or horse or mule yanking on the reins from a halter mouthpiece that would be banned anywhere in the world to the delight of a very happy tourist.

Another young lad getting ready to whip the photographer if he fails to give him money.

A shy local hiding behind his door.

Have your 'eyes amazed' [sic] by the cobbled streets, nicely painted coloured buildings with shady verandas, bright flowers in pots and out of pots climbing up exteriors -

'Cute houses with red tile roofs covered by colorful bugamvilias will amaze your eyes.' 

As another publication puts it. A bugumvilia, by the way, is a plant only seen on a red tiled roof in El Quelite, no were else.

Amaze your eyes on a cathedral off the plaza, visit ladies who pick stones out beans [sic], stand and gawp at sweating peasants digging into the hard rocky ground to plant their beans outside town, eat in a couple of typical restaurants, buy tortillas in a hand-made tortilla making shop (better ones can be had in downtown Mazatlán) taste cheese in a cheese shop (damn good cheese) and check out a honey shop and watch groups of bored teenagers sitting all over the plaza chortling under their hands at the outsiders wandering aimlessly around.

Toddler disappearing into a dark doorway.

I came to the conclusion that the locals who live in El Quelite get as much pleasure from looking at tourists as the tourists do of looking at 'typical' Mexicans therein. So please get yourselves up there for the benefit of the gringo gazers in that little town. They need our money to sit around on their rocking chairs or to whip their donkeys or paint up as Ulama players for the benefit of us visitors. The Queen of England serves the same purpose after all as does the soon to be royal wedding we are getting so hot under the collar about.

But I think you will agree with me if you have seen Yul Brynner in the film Westworld that those very real Mexican people are 'switched' off to save their batteries when the tourists leave town."

Cheese shop  veranda

Photographer pursuing a local man in a hat.

Dusty Jock and his sidekick enjoying a meal at a restaurant off the main street. Not El Meson de los Laureanos. The eejit has forgotten the name of this one but it served damn tasty food. It's up the main street and to the right at the end of town.

Fresh milk for the cheese factory.
Post note:

Our man Jock was last seen being chased without his pants and wearing one shoe into the hills surrounding El Quelite after really pissing off the tech guys who did the 'switching off' when he was seen hiding in a doorway hoping to get to the bottom of the false atmosphere in that town. We do suggest however that a visit to Copala will provide a better experience but more on that later when we locate 'Dusty' and brush him off if he hasn't already kept running back to South Africa.

Note : The views of our new travel writer Jock Karrooac in no way mirror those of the MazReal proprietors.

© 2011 All Images MazReal Publications


  1. Well, I'm glad MazReal doesn't mirror the views of Jock. He couldn't be more wrong. I lived in El Quelite for over a year, and when the tourists leave town, yes the donkeys in front of the resturant go back to their barns, but the rest of the town finally comes alive. A typical weekend evening after the tourists have left is when El Quelite lights up. the main street is lined with colorfully lighted food carts and local families open their street side restaurants. The local cowboys, which reside in surrounding ranches arrive on horseback and "cruise the gut" on horseback. The plazuela is busy with the second hand market, children learning to roller skate, a birthday party or a live band and dance. The church has daily mass. Local ranchers many times organize a parade of sorts for the horse race that are planned. All the local salesmen would pass our house selling everything as they do in Mazatlan. The list goes on. When it rained in the evening, everyone brought their rocking chairs out to their covered porches with candles. the entire family was out there enjoying the cooling rains and the fire flies. Sorry Jock, You have no idea what you are talking about.

    Lisa Lankins

  2. Hi Lisa.

    We are happy you love the life in El Quelite as a resident and I am sure lots of wonderful things happen when the tourists go. But we must come to the aid of our writers as they are not here to reply. If our writer (who knows where he is?) stayed to find out he may experience what you describe but we are talking about what El Quelite has to offer for the casual daytripper who only hangs around for an hour or two and the feeling of the town to that person ant that particular time. Your wonderful town is always talked about in positive terms but this blog's views and those of its writers are taken from a purely personal and subjective point of view. There is also a healthy dose of irony which many readers of this blog, if there are any, will appreciate and will take with a pinch of salt. We are here to entertain not just give out dry information.

    We appreciate your comments and long my you enjoy El Quelite. I can if you wish add your experience to a postscript or you may not like to be associated with our blog?

  3. oh and if you do go to El Quelite, don't miss The tortilla maker, the delicious bakery, a visit to the cock farm, The lookout over the town and the Sierra Madre mountains, tour the church, and don't miss Meson de los Laureanos restaurant, not only for the food, but for the atmosphere which this family owned restaurant has obviously dedicated itself to creating.. Lisa

  4. Thank You मैट माव्सन, a healthy dose of irony doesn't talk tourists out of going to a town that definately depends on tourism.. I don't mind being associated with your blog. Lisa

  5. That's very kind of you. We may invite you to join our exclusive club situated above the pool hall in Teniente Azueta.

  6. Irony and a jaundiced (and practiced) eye is what keeps me coming back for more! The best blog within miles; okay continents.


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